


soon 2 b dead

by junmyeonssi



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Chatting & Messaging, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Fluff, Humor, M/M, Possible violence, chatfic, courtesy of kyungsoo, i mean xiuchen is there, the members who left might appear eventually
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-17
Updated: 2019-01-19
Packaged: 2019-10-11 12:04:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17446625
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/junmyeonssi/pseuds/junmyeonssi
Summary: a chat filled with people who abandoned you for china and crackheads and that one 'edgy' member? sounds like exoalternatively, a chat fic made by a person who doesn't know memes or vines and is making up humor as he goes





	1. dearly beloved

**Author's Note:**

> TIS I THE WORST CRACK FIC WRITER IN HISTORY   
> NOW SUFFER

***byunbaek has created a new chat***

***byunbaek has renamed chat gay losers***

**byunbaek:** im forgetting something.. 

***byunbaek has added money, chanyeol has big ears, my ears arent big, DAEnosaur, chicken, hun, mini, china sheep***

**byunbaek:** dearly beloved we r gathered here today 

 **chanyeol has big ears:** shut up baekhyun if you're going to act like that then at least use proper grammar. 

 **byunbaek:** im offended 

 **byunbaek:** also.. 

***byunbaek has changed hun's name to edgy boi***

***byunbaek has changed china sheep's name to abandoned us for china***

**byunbaek:** better but xing whyd u leave us 

 **byunbaek:** was it his parents

 **byunbaek:** OMG THEY ARE TRIGN TO KEP TEH LOML AWAY 

 **money:** baekhyun type correctly please...... 

 **byunbaek:** BUT XING IS IN CHINA AND I MISS HIM 

 **chicken:** stfu baekhyun we all kno ur in love w xing u dont need to broadcast it thru the dorms 

 **chicken:** soo pls help me >:( baekhyun is yelling 

 **chanyeol has big ears:** I'm coming. 

***read by seven (7) people***

**DAEnosaur:** which of u fuckers ate my pudding 

 **mini:** sorry dae ill buy u more? 

 **DAEnosaur:**......apology accepted 

 **my ears arent big:** cough coughwhipped cough 

 **mini:** chanyeol.. u cant cough in a chat group :) 

 **byunbaek:** THT SMILE IS SCARY 

 **edgy boi:** WHO MADE THIS MY USERNAME UR DEAD 

 **chicken:** isnt he so cute 

 **byunbaek:** odd flex but ok 

***chicken has changed byunbaek's name to soon 2 b dead***

**soon 2 b dead:** Y AM I SO HATED IN MY OWN GROUP 

 **edgy boi:** if u hadnt changed my name..... 

 **soon 2 b dead:** wHO bEtRaYeD mE 

 **money:** sorry baek but.. 

 **soon 2 b dead:** OMG MYEON HIW CPULD U 

 **money:** it was jongdae 

 **DAEnosaur:** my leader has betrayed me... 

 **DAEnosaur:** mE 

 **DAEnosaur:** his FAVORITE 

 **DAEnosaur:** aH wAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE 

***read by eight (8) people***

**abandoned us for china:** what's this? and my username? i didn't abandon you :( 


	2. quotev????

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> so baekhyun has an idea

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> LO AND BEHOLD TIS I   
> AND THIS IS YOUR DESCENT TO HELL

**soon 2 b dead:** someone change my name nd ill tell u about this cool site i found 

***DAEnosaur has changed soon 2 b dead's name to ugly mullet***

**ugly mullet:** wut did i do to deserve this 

 **chicken:** existed 

 **chick:** existed 

 **baby chick:** existed 

 **DAE** **nosaur:** b u t i changed ur name now tell 

 **ugly mullet:** its called quotev and theres a lot of drama n shit so...lets join!!!!! 

 **DAEnosaur:** i saw that site before all the ppl are ugly except like 2 

 **chicken:** if you buy chicken ill join 

 **ugly mullet:** ok 

 **ugly mullet:** so its.. 

 **ugly mullet:** USERNAME TIME 

 **money:** no it's not it's fucking 2 in the morning and you need to sleep because I saw your schedule and I know you have classes go tf to sleep and add yifan tao and luhan later I'm sure they'll join you in your descent to hell 

 **ugly mullet:** but..but mother im already in hell 

 **money:** BYUN BAEKHYUN IS2G 

 **ugly mullet:** were going were going

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> minor changes will be made to the first chapter so you should reread that   
> chanyeol is patiently waiting for an appearance ig   
> tell me if you notice any errors  
> WOOP QUOTEV

**Author's Note:**

> the read by -insert amount of people- is basically just to replace random breaks in the story   
> exo isn't ot9 lmao   
> they're just whipped for yixing   
> an angel :(


End file.
